I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT I SCORED ONLY 18 OUTTA 25 FOR MY 1ST ACCOUNTING FOR ASSETS TEST IN MY LIFE. THAT'S SO DISAPPOINTING OF ME. It's like, as good as i failed the test.
Upon knowing that i actually got such a disgusting mark, my nose went sour immediately. It was just so much i wanted to cry but managed to hold it back cos i thought it won't be nice to cry in front of my classmates. But when i was in the library studying for stats, my eyes began welled up with tears upon thinking about my unforgivable score. I started to think if can i make it for my stats ica. It was so saddening that i teared a bit. Hope clare didn't notice then. That's so embarrassing can? Oh well~
Think that the last time i broke down because of my academic results was the exams before prelims? Crappy. Due to the stress from exams and others, i've been seeing my school counsellor since secondary 3. And for the period during my last exams before prelims, it was so bad that my counsellor suggested that i have my result slip taken in her office room, just in case i break down, again.
And shit, i did. Oh gosh, i'm a useless bum who only managed to score an A1. The rest were A2, some B4, C5 and C6. Disgusting grades.. I remembered that i cried quite badly in her office then. So much so that my result slip was wet. Okay, loser.
My parents, Ryan and Clare reassured me that it was alright to score 18 outta 25. They even came out with 101 reasons, trying to convince me that.
Ryan asked me what's my satisfactory score for ica and i said at least 20. And he asked me if i would really be happy if i did scored 20. I was dumbfounded. I couldn't reply him. Because i clearly know myself that if i were to get a 20, i will think that why can't i score 21 instead of 20. And perhaps when i got a 21, why not a 22?
And frankly speaking, i don't think that scoring a distinction for my effective communication ica1 speech is a big deal. The irony is that i can feel for it more when i fail something rather than excelling. In fact, my sense of satisfaction for getting a distinction for speech ica1 faded as soon as i left the tutorial room. And i managed to convince myself that it really isn't a big deal cos i just went up and talk trash during the speech ica1.
SUPER DISAPPOINTED.
